| i almost resorted to posting this meaningful passage on my myspace, but i decided that xanga has been very good to me through the years so i could not leave it behind. besides, xanga is for meaningful thought... myspace is for boredom relief.
over the past few months i have dicovered something that has broken my heart. i love my friends, my family, my boyfriend... i love my life. but i've realized that eventually you just have to let go of the past. not forget the past, not separate yourself from the past... just realize that the past is the past and things will never be the same again. unfortunately i've come to the understanding that if you choose not to accept things for how they are, and you dwell on how they aren't, then you will be miserable. aka: the last 4 months of my life. i love my girls, and when i get to see them it is heavenly. but because i know that there is truly no one else out there like them, i have become a cynic when it comes to friends. it just seems that since i have found such a compatible few, that i don't need more. and if i was still in keller, that would be oh so true... but i'm in abilene. the city from hell. no... i really do like abilene. the people? ehh... i don't know about that. but like i said earlier, i haven't allowed myself to like them. i don't WANT to like them because for some reason i have convinced myself that if i do then i might lose my real friends... my best friends. after seeing katie and anna this last weekend and hearing their stories about their friends from school, i realize that that's not the case at all. because when they came home it was like old times again. okay, maybe a LITTLE different. but not really. i don't really know where i'm getting with this. but it's just been pressing on my brain and my heart lately. thought i'd let it out. love you all so much. |
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| WANTED- one female roommate
MUST HAVE:
microwave cart
television
furniture made for food storage
PREFERRED:
no anal retentive habits
no psychotic thoughts
no weapons
a good personality that's willing to be friends... maybe just acquaintances
so... i'm screwed really. yeah, pretty much.
thank you. |
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| you know you're cool when you can sit in your room and have an AIM conversation with the person on the other side of the room.
so what if candace and i are lame? we like it.
stillwagoner28 (2:34:54 PM): so what if i am
smile rachs here (2:35:01 PM): you're a loser too
stillwagoner28 (2:35:10 PM): i just follow my roommate
smile rachs here (2:35:24 PM): that's right woman, at least you know how it's supposed to be
smile rachs here (2:35:33 PM): i knew you'd learn
stillwagoner28 (2:35:43 PM): you're a lame-o
smile rachs here (2:36:05 PM): this is xangaworthy
maybe a few edits in there. |
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| so monday is going to suck.
it seems like yesterday. but it's been a whole freakin year. |
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| going home this weekend..... pretty excited. |
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